All Grown Up...

So I've been a bit MIA. Part of that is because I've spent most weekends lately with the Midwesterner. He comes to visit all the time, and we've been out in the Hamptons a bunch. Yes, sounds swanky. Yes, the house is gorgeous. We really just sit around the pool drinking beers with a bunch of couples though. One of them even has KIDS! So, as you can see, I don't have tons of great material.

Except that last weekend I started getting nonstop texts and phone calls from none other than my long time Latin flame from back at the beginning of the blog. It's like the neverending story with the two of us. Except the mini endings don't have any relation to fairy tales. So, after lots of hemming and hawing, I decided to go out with him tonight.

Until I didn't. Today at work I was on the fence all day about it. Pete (midwesterner) is around all the time. And he's a great catch: handsome, athletic, bright, interested in the same things that I am, and he really likes me. And it seems that he wants to be in a relationship. I decided that if I'm the almost 30 yr old who claims they are looking for love and commitment, what the HELL am I doing screwing up a possibly great thing?? I started thinking about my past. I, my friends, am the ex boyfriend Queen of the Universe. Trust me, the crown is ugly, jagged, and tarnished. I've messed up almost every relationship I've ever been in either with cheating, jealousy, storytelling, or mis-prioritizing. It is a sad history and I'm okay to joke about it, but not proud about the real backstories involved.

So, when my former rico suave called to decide on a dinner spot, I cancelled. (yes, I am aware that this is also rude - but less rude than letting him buy me dinner while I'm clearly dating someone else). Anyway, he was polite about it, but basically shrugged me off and said that over the past few weeks it's been obvious that I'm too busy to squeeze him into my schedule, so he'll see me whenever. Not exactly the closure I was looking for, but...

Now I'm happy that I've made this decision to focus on Pete. Things may get a little bit hairy now that the summer's over and real life in NY is about to begin. However, I can promise, I'm going to give an adult relationship a real shot. To be continued.

Lauren

My weekend outside NY. Way outside of NY

I got on a flight out to Pittsburgh to meet the new beaus' colleagues, parents and friends. The beginning was a disaster. My flight was packed ans I arrived to an awkward welcome. It had been three weeks since we'd seen each other and between the cheap square toe shoe and nervous laugh he had. Our first few hours were awful, and he claimed that all of the jittery energy had something to do with 3 cups of late afternoon coffee. Yeah right.



The company party went off well and the awkwardness wore off. I think it was a combination of cocktails, good food, and my remembering what I liked about him.



Saturday was a significant improvement, and things got better every hour. Some time with the parents, friends from high school, neighbors... Met them all. And I was dressed to impress them all. Beach cover ups, gold sandals, jewelry changes,... I was the fanciest person in all of Pittsburgh! Ha. Isn't it a NY motto that overdressed is always better than underdressed?



Saturday night we barhopped and ended up at his parents house late. We decided that the best idea was to sleep together in his childhood room. I've never done that before. The morning was a bit awkward at breakfast with his mom, at least for me.



Oh, and the piece that I almost left out - the sex and the city nightmare - Sunday morning consisted of that on and off sleep. My stomach was killing me from drinking, junk food, and weekend without much bathroom privacy. You can guess the horrendous feeling when an unladylike noise escaped. We both pretended we were asleep. But I know we weren't. It was awful. How can that be forgotten? Not only does his mom think I'm a slut, he thinks I'm a pig!



Ayayay. At least he still seemed into me on Sunday during the day. We've got plans for 2 weeks from now.



Xx

Lauren

Calendar Girl

My midwestern man has had no type of conversation with me about our "relationship" and what it is or where it's going. In fact, there's been no mention of exclusivity or terminology. I'm happy to go with this flow for a little while, after all, we've only known eachother for 2 months and have been seeing one another for about six weeks. AND, all of those six weeks are long distance.

So, I was surprised to receive a google calendar via email yesterday. It is our shared calendar, presented to me by my new man. I'm happy, but also a bit nervous. It details our weekends together (and which weekends we are apart) through October 30. It's not even July 30. That is 3 month out… which is a longer time than we've even known one another! Is this great news, or is this guy overzealous and kind of insane? Plus, as we haven't discussed any type of eventual move, it seems absurd that we're now talking about trips away together and all kinds of events if this is going to be a permanently long distance thing. I don't deal well with uncertainty. What does this mean? Can I continue to keep my mouth shut? Or does our next meeting warrant the question from me "Do you see this going anywhere and if so, where?"

To make this morning more interesting, I saw Carlos on the street this morning on my way to work. We had the most brief non-conversation hello you've ever seen. He all but ignored me, and I think that if I hadn't made eye contact, the quick "hola, como estas?" would not even have happened. For about a millisecond, my heart dropped into my stomach. But, a millisecond later, I kept walking, head high, and no attached feelings. I'm cured!

Visit part deux

The midwesterner wanted to come back again last weekend. Since I'm genuinely interested and want to give this a chance, I said of course - although I'm concerned that so many hours straight is a recipe for disaster. However, it went off almost without a hitch. I have a short, NY temper (which I'm working on), so I had one or two moments on the verge of snapping. However, all in all, we got along great, had a ton of fun, and ended the weekend on Monday morning before work :). We already made plans for two weeks from now. I'm visiting him and attending a work party and meeting his parents. Intense?

I've all but forgotten about other guys and have lost interest completely in trying to keep up with my normally robust dating schedule. Is this a good sign, or am I jinxing myself and might I be kidding myself about a relationship with someone from another part of the country? I know it's only been six weeks and a few visits, but the last thing I want as I approach 30 is to be with a guy who isn't taking this seriously, because of the distance and our very different lifestyles. On the other hand, Anne always says that if two people fall in love, distance doesn't matter. And she can cite a million examples. But could I be one?

Xx

Lauren

Long distance?

The midwesterner had left NY less than 2 weeks ago asking when he could come back to see me. We decided on this past weekend. He seemed eager to get here and hesitant to leave. Which is great, but leaves me a bit nervous that we are pushing the envelope a bit spending over 48 hours together this early on. He arrived at 7 and we had dinner and drinks before heading to bed a bit tipsy and having already discussed seeing eachother again. Saturday we spent the day watching the World Cup and later hitting the beach for the rest of the weekend. Everything went well and he's a great guy. Interesting, successful, nice, and genuinely interested (or seems to be) in a relationship! Even from another time zone...

He's offered to come back this coming weekend for the 4th of July. Seems wonderful, but again - how much time together is too much time at this stage of the game. And where is this going? How can we put a lot of effort into something without knowing if one of us would even be WILLING to relocate? However, I'm determined not to undermine this one just yet. He's a great catch, and although there might not be fireworks exploding every time I hear his name (although we had an interesting experience with the timing of a fireworks show late Saturday night... if you get my drift...), everything seems to be there and there's chemistry. In my experience, that's only about 5% of the male population for me, and only about 5% of that 5% are single and interested in me. So I really need to count my blessings here, right? Or do I cut my losses before spending months going back and forth between NY and Chicago only to realize that we don't want to be in the same place, so it can never be?

For now, I'm taking Anne's advice and being open to the idea, no questions asked (just yet). Anne, I love you, but I"m all ears if anyone else has an opinion.

Lauren

The midwesterner comes to town

So, as I'd said, mark from my Patagonia trip was cute, nice, gainfully employed, and emailing me! Unfortunately, he doesn't live anywhere near here. I guess it could be worse. He could NOT be emailing me.

Just so hapens that he will be in town for a friends birthday... It's Monday morning, so here's my wknd recap...

Friday we go our separate ways. He's off to a buddys birthday and I'm at work drinks. I feel embarassed that I asked if we could meet up. He basically says no because the party is technically in Hoboken - new jersey...

I get over the slight and figure he'll call in the morning.

He does!

At 9am! We go for a run and then sit on my terrrace talking for a few hours. He heads back to nj to shower and change and we meet back up for cocktails with a few friends. He is really cute. Next thing I know, it's 530 am and we are sitting on my deck talking. I decide it's time for some sleep and he stays with me. It was great - nothing happened! He's sweet and not aggressive at all. Definitely not a ny banker type. Thank goodness!

xo
Lauren

Late night disaster

I love when Anne is in NYC. We are a disastrous pair, but have the best time shopping, brunching, laughing, and Partying... note the capital P. It's just post patagonia and seems as though my Latin lover has missed me! I had decided that as soon as annes visit ended, I'd speak my mind and let him know how I felt and what I wanted (rather, what I needed to prevent myself from going completely crazy wondering what I'm doing with him).

So, on annes last night, we decide to make it a big one. Out all night. We somehow meet several professional basketball players and accept their invitation to drinks and a great spot at a lounge. To be honest, I don't even like that lounge and am happy to buy my own drinks, but the novelty of an evening with unknown pro athletes seems like a good idea at the time (1am). Long story short, I run smack into my Latin hearthrob with an oversized athlete hanging over me. It did not go over well. Can you blame him? He has basically lost all respect for me and I spent several days with an aching heart, feeling ashamed of my behavior, and trying to talk to him. To no avail.
Finally, I wrote down everything Id wanted to say a few weeks ago and clicked send. Impersonal, but better than camping out at his house.

Several days later I got a reponse. Not a positive one. He's offended by my behavior, but also sees no future with me. He'll call me sometime to talk. Fat chance. And there you have it- terrible situation, but finally, closure. And you know what, I'm ok. Deep down it's what I knew, but didn't want to know and couldn't bring myself to face the end of what was so much fun and a wonderful daydream.

So now I'm single. Totally and 100% single.

For this week, I'm actually satisfied this way. Dating was heartache and my emotions need a break. Remind me of this when I complain I don't have a date for my friends dinner party nxt week.

xo Lauren

Adventures in Patagonia

One of my long time dreams was to hike through Patagonia, see the glaciers and the mountains, and be totally removed from civilization. No phones, no computers, no hairdryers. Check! I did it. Four days of pretty serious roughing it. No electricity, no showering (gross), and definitely no makeup. However, society has managed a way to deliver cold beer to outposts that don't even have flushing toilets, which leads to the meat of my story. A few girlfriends and I celebrate our accomplishment and how well we've been "roughing it" with beers and drinking games. Of course, the guy / girl ratio at this "bar" is in our favor, so I end up talking to Mark. Mark is an adventurous midwestern guy who loves to travel, has a great job, and works out nonstop (very obvious from the moment we meet). One beer leads to another and he walks me back to my camp after dark. It has started to rain and we kiss like 8th graders for a good long while. It's not a vacation without some sort of romantic interlude, right?

Luckily, he's not as 8th grade the following day, and we spend some time together and exchange contact information. When I get back to NYC, I have an email waiting from him! And... he happens to be coming to NY the following weekend. Do I just go with it and end up having a short fling with a midwestern ironman? Or do I realize that this is probably not ideal relationship material? Why is the midwest so far from ny?!



Lauren

So many men... so little time...

Well, so there ARE so many men in my life. Unfortunately, I can't tell how much any of them like me. For that matter, sometimes I don't even know how I feel about them. Here's the short of the long story:

Carlos - we'd had very tentative plans for either Wed or Thurs. Wed he basically flaked, so in my utmost maturity I made solid plans for Thursday. (a date). Of course he called me on Thursday morning to find out what our plan would be. I responded that I had tickets to an art show and dinner plans. He sounded upset. I stayed over ... yes, after a date with someone else. (who i did not even kiss). I realize how awful that sounds and haver zero excuse. Except that I am trying everything to get over Carlos. It just doesn't seem to work.

Friday - I speak to Carlos around 7pm and indicate that I'll be at home relaxing. If his nap doesn't get him energized for clubbing, I'm happy to go get a drink somewhere. He calls me back, 2 hours later, we go for a drink, and spend the Friday night together. Healthy. Very healthy.

Saturday - date from Thursday night meets my friends and I out at a party. After WAY too many cocktails, I believe I confess (more or less) that I have feelings for someone else. I guess he's out of the picture. A friend calls me a "mythical dating creature" while out. Single friends think my dating life is impressive. If I only divulged the pathetic details, they'd finally see the sad truth. aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Sunday - wake up to a txt from Carlos stating that NY life is too intense and that we need to get ourselves to a Panamanian beach. If he only knew... I proceed to go have brunch with my "english guy". He's that great guy that I thought I would still have a chance with and it just wasn't the same. I think he's disinterested. It KILLS me. And makes me wonder what I can do to stop thinking about damn Carlos, get the English guy back in my life, and be normal. Is that possible?? Then... Carlos calls... he wants me to go on a double date with his friend and girlfriend (I"ve met them before in another context). My stomach flip flops, my heart races, I accept, and spend Sunday night with them. AND... it's totally natural. This just makes me like him more. Guys, can you please tell me how to get over him???

Lauren

Lauren, a few more days, a few more dates.

Well, a few more days = a few more txt messages from Carlos. All cute enough, but still not enough. When you know the guy that you like well enough, txt messages stop being enough. I know that this is a bad sign, but just when I'm sick of him, he sends me something that sets my daydream back into motion. Will I ever grow out of this?

At least I'm not closing myself off to other options. Last night, after much hemming and hawing, I went for dinner, for the second time, with the grad student who I thought had more or less blown me off. In a very dramatic turn of events, he pledged how often he was thinking about me and liked me, and that this was just a miscommunication - a cultural difference. I'm the first one to admit what a sucker I am for sweet talk, so date number two was on. It was fun, albeit weird. Think middle school make out meets philosophical debate. I hate to debate: politics and religion are not part of my date 2 repertoire! Anyway, it was fun and he's cute! The problem with this one : not only do we have zero in common, but he's moving in two weeks. How do I possibly find every guy in manhattan that I could never work out with, and choose to date them? Along this line, our next date is for later this week to see a movie. A foreign film at Lincoln center... Very cool and sooo not me. Stay tuned to hear how I handle date 3...

While you're waiting, you should have a Quasi date to read about even sooner. I'm going with a friend of a friend to tomorrow nights Yankee game. I love ball games, he has great tickets, we are both single and... Oh yes, we kissed a few years back at a party. We don't keep in touch too well and never had very much chemistry, but I'll invoke the NY Lotto again here: "hey, you never know"

I hope that my fellow nyers are similarly taking advantage of this great city, but more lucky in love than I am.

XX
Lauren

Lauren, the secret girlfriend

Do you ever wonder if you are the "secret" girlfriend / hookup / date of someone? I can't tell if Carlos likes me and keeps me a complete secret, or if my expectations are completely misaligned with what is going on between us. What is going on between us you ask? I like him, I think he likes me. We occasionally go out. We occasionally sleep together. And that's where it seems to end and not be on the fast track to anything. Yesterday we were at a mutual friend's barbecue. We act like friends and nobody would ever know that 4 days ago, I was making his bed. Oh yea - except for the one guy who saw a not so discreet text message between us.

How long is long enough to wait patiently to see if someone wants to move on from hook up to boyfriend... heck, just give me dating... status.? Our basic recent history is 1 month of being in touch constantly, spending more time together - including dinner , movies, staying in, and a weekend away at a wedding. Am I being insane thinking that we should have a more official status by now? I'm so self conscious about making him feel "pressured", that I think I let him get away with anything. He may even think that this is all I WANT from him. How do I know what I can say to him without scaring him away for good? That's the dilemma I'm constantly thinking about. In the end, I don't say anything.

Lauren

Lauren + Sunday Doldrums

Things always go worst on Saturday nights. Something goes wrong in my brain and allows me to act like a lunatic. That was all well and good at 22, but at 29 how is it that I'm still doing it? Nobody else seems to be! Last night was a friend's wedding. Basically my last friend from childhood getting married... and I was at the wedding stag. I wasn't even invited with a date. As though they knew that I wouldn't have one. It's a bit offensive, but I try not to take it personally. The wedding was a blast - I danced and drank champagne all night. After too many drinks, I came home and changed out of my pastel dress into a black sparkly jersey dress and sent a txt message to Carlos. Well, I actually responded to a txt message from Carlos - about 4 hours late. Well, I'll spare you the details, but I woke up at his house again this morning. Actually, this afternoon. Plus, when I look back through my texting history it makes me want to vomit. I just pray that guys never go through their texting history the way I do. If so, he has hard evidence that I am obsessed with seeing him - and I am terribly embarassed.

Now it's my typical Sunday, where I think about what I'm doing (and not doing) with my life. It's pretty depressing. While everyone else is in real and meaningful relationships, I go back and forth between laughing and crying over my sorry state of affairs. And looking at my recent call & text message history is making it much, much worse. Why isn't there a program on my iphone to prevent me from self destruction post cocktails? I think that a big glass of red wine coupled with some episodes of Sex In the City is my only possible solution.

Lauren

Lauren + The Brit

On Friday night, I had a dinner date with an old flame. We've dated on two separate occasions and he's wonderful: tall, handsome, fun, well traveled, gainfully employed, and nice. How can you go wrong? Well, I can't tell if it's a cultural difference (he's English) or just him, but it never seems to me that we are in a real relationship that could be going somewhere. However, he's casually introduced me to his sister and some colleagues and when we're together, he treats me like his girlfriend. However, when we're not together, a few days can go by without a word, or just a text message, and all of our time together seems to be "dates", rather than just getting to know eachother doing the mundane things. Although, it seems he doesn't do any of the mundane things that I do (grocery shop, cook, clean, watch House)...

Anyway, we had a fabulous (and very over the top) dinner with wine, champagne, and steak. Later, we went to a trendy club in the Meatpacking to meet some friends of his. After some dancing and everyone refering to me as Simon's girlfriend, I went home. Alone. After all, I can keep several men in my speed dial, but I can't very well be sleeping at all of their apartments, right? I'm attempting to keep some small level of dignity. Anyway, since then he's been in touch and even asked me to a wedding - in Italy! - this summer. Now, I think that Simon would be a great boyfriend, if he just knew how to be a boyfriend. Do we think he likes me enough to take some direction on what it is that I would need and want in order to be in a relationship with him? I can't tell if he likes me enough and is simply ignorant to the fact that I need some more affection and to set firm ideas and boundaries about what our relationship is - or if he only likes me enough to date me casually. I'm contemplating just bringing it up. Keep in mind our Friday night date was the first time we've seen eachother in 6 months. However, he called me for my birthday, New Years, and Valentine's Day. Heck, I don't even think that Valentine's Day is the same day for Brits!

So, my new plan is to see him one or two more times and take a deep breath and lay it all on the line. Tell him that I like him and think we could have a meaningful relationship, but that I only want to continue seeing him if we are going to have an honest and meaningful relationship. I'll have to explain that I'm high maintenance about attention and, although I pretend I am very easy going and relaxed, I am neurotic about relationships. (probably part of why I'm a failure at them).

All the while, I'm still hedging my bets with a few other gentlemen. When I write this stuff down I begin to realize what a hypocrit I am. I hope that you can see it comes from a fear of being alone and not out of malintent. I also hope that none of these guys ever see our blog.

xx
Lauren

Lauren + Marco

Well, another day, another cute bearded guy. I've also got a mini crush on a guy who is nothing like me. He's very academic, reads Tolstoy, loves to talk about philosophy and listens to what I consider "cool" music. By "cool", I mean things that sound great by bands I've never heard of and cannot be found on the radio. I am not a music buff by any means, and am often self conscious in front of these types. Anyway, Carlos hasn't called me today (obviously) and the writer whose name I don't know hasn't and will not call me (I mean, I wouldn't either. I'm a finance type that doesn't even know his name and he's creative and doesn't forget names). This combination leaves me thinking about my newest mini crush - he's a colleague of my roommate, Italian, and... of course... has a beard. Do you see a theme? Anyway, he apparently ASKED about me, which makes my interest multiply by 300%. My brilliant plan: ask my friend to send a group email inviting people (including he & I) to do something this weekend. I replied all, which gives him my contact information. Success! Marco responds just to me and we have a brief email conversation, where he says he'd love to get to know me better and that we should go to the movies. Nevermind how this is inherently contradictory: he wants to get to know me better, yet suggests we sit in a dark room full of other people in silence to watch a movie...? Is it just me who thinks that doesn't fit? Whatever, I'm in.Now that he's given me the "general" let's go out comment, do I just sit tight and wait? I know the answer: I wait (luckily I already know that I'll see him on Sunday evening at a barbecue). I'm assuming I'll be waiting several days, but hopefully I can add this one to my list of possibilities for summer romance!

Lauren

Lauren + Carlos

Well, last night I was supposed to go running and cook dinner with an ex colleague, who happens to be tall, dark, handsome, and has seen me naked in two separate countries. I daydream that we'll grow old together on the beach in Panama (he's Panamanian), with little kids running around and tropical fruit every morning for breakfast. Unfortunately, he feeds this daydream by mentioning things about how we'll move down there together and open up a juice bar at the beach and live happily ever after in the sun. It makes me crazy... especially because after all of this great talk, his idea of us spending time together is normally a txt message at 10pm on a saturday night asking where I am for the evening. Not exactly boyfriend material. A little bit of background information: I've had a crush on him for 3 years, he is younger than I am, and I recently went away with him for the weekend to Mexico. I have absolutely no guts, or I'd just ask him what he thinks of me, what he's looking for, and see if I can deal with the answer. Since I don't think that I can deal with the answer, I leave well enough alone and spend time with him when I can and keep looking for the real life Mr Right.

Back to last night: he got stuck at work and it rained, so running together went down the drain. Instead, I went to the gym and met him at his place for a home cooked meal. We watched some tv and I stayed over, even though it meant an insanely difficult morning getting to work. It was worth it. Anything for the guy you have a crush on, right? He asked why I never call him or invite him to do things. Is he just feeding my crush and making things worse, or is he right? Am I unwittingly living in 1958 and missing out on great guys because I can't just take a deep breath and call them? I never call guys and never invite them to do anything. I'm terrified of the rejection. But I also figure, as learned in the 2008 classic "He's Just Not That Into You", if he wants to date me, he'll make it obvious and just ask me out. How can a girl get what she wants and be modern without being aggressive and scaring guys away? When I left in the morning, I didn't want to wake him up. I thought that was sweet of me - letting him sleep. He thought it was weird and sent me an email later that day asking why I ran out without saying Good Morning or Goodbye?? I can't seem to get it right with this guy. What I really need is to study the art of mind reading. Either that or forget about Carlos.

Lauren

Lauren + nameless sexy writer

Another weekend in NYC - life in the fast lane. This is when I start to wonder if I'll ever grow up. And lie awake making a list of all of the bad behavior I will discontinue starting Monday. On Friday night I went to chris' house to rent a movie and order takeout. I met chris through a friend a few weeks ago on a blind date. His resume is perfect: cute, well educated, great job, nice guy, settled down, looking to meet a great girl. What's the catch? Well, it's twofold. He makes me yawn and he doesn't want to live in the ny area for long. I'm not sure which is a bigger deal for me. Boring or the fact that he hates ny. I'd understand if he were looking to move someplace intereting - hong kong, Sydney, Paris, but the decision seems to be driven by a longing for warmer weather and a bigger house. Did I mention this guy is only 29!? What do you need a big house in the suburbs for at 29? Unless he has a family of five that I don't know about. Anyway, of course he likes me. Everyone that I want to date is disinterested. Everyone who does want to date me is basically void of excitement and curiosity. But makes loads of dough at a fancy hedge fund. It poses quite a dilemma for me. Well, today we met for a beer and I decided that ive got to stop seeing him and clear my schedule for guys that could have a future with me.
It's hard for me to find those kind. I imagine that it's tough for any normal guy to take me seriously. Picture this: after 8 hours of mimosas and wine at one of the dangerous NYC establishments that provides unlimited cheap champagne at brunch, I head downtown with two single girlfriends. We shouldn't have even been allowed IN a bar at that point. I meet a guido looking guy in a very tight black t shirt who asks for my digits. I oblige. Heck, everyone eserves a chance, right? We move on to bar number two where I spot a guy with a beard. This seems too good to be true. I love beards and it adds instant sex appeal for me. None of the fancy groomed stuff - I'm talking full lumberjack beard. Love them. I not so coyly meet, talk to, and kiss (yes, at the bar) the beard guy. At this point my memory fades to grey and I wake up (yes alone) at noon with a raging headache. However, I've got a txt from the beard guy and we make plan to have dinner. Tonight. With a raging hangover and lack of memories, I have dinner with him. Turns out he's a writer: he's also funny, tall, interesting, smart, and sexy. He took me to the diner!!! Not your typical hedge fund Nyer, oh, AND he put up with my shenanigans last night. He's either awesome or an alcoholic. He walked me home and no real kiss. Just the cheek. Get this, i Dont need to make up an alias. I don't know his name!! I can't remember from last night and he didn't say it in his texts. It was too late at dinner to admit the problem, so I just avoided needing to use his name. I'm not sure if he noticed. I feel awful and I actually like him! How can I find out his name? Will he call? Was he interested? Could I date and get along with the smart, alternative, struggling writer that lives in queens? Or was thinking about this a waste of my time? Or maybe - just maybe - this is exactly the type I should be dating and it never works out because I'm always with the yuppy finance type... I'll keep you posted.
Lauren

Lauren + Joe

So today I met the man of my dreams. Ok, I've said that before, but everytime it happens it renews my hope that I will meet someone great and someday all of the bridal & baby showers, bachelorette parties, dateless weddings, cake tastings, etc that Ive attended with a big smile will be repaid. It will be my turn.
Unfortunately, up until now, I haven't quite figured which guys should not even enter my radar. Case in point:
I'm not desperate to leave my job (yet), but I am looking. I found a great opening in another building with another division and sent my resume. I was informed that I was probably too junior, but that they'd entertain meeting with me. I was afraid that the interviewer would be tall, successful, and cute based on his voice. I was right.
Before I knocked on the office door, I took a quick glimpse through the glass and knew I was developing a major crush. Not ideal pre interview... But cest la vie. We spoke for twenty minutes and then had lunch together. Just sandwiches, but I was already contemplating how to bridge work to social conversation... Success. He KNOWS
Sophia!! How is the world possibly this small? I couldn't even
think about conversation, my head was racing back to how this was the perfect way for me to get some background info on him and move forward to project Make Out With Joe. It was already obvious that I was grossly underqualified for the job.
On my way back to my office, I was already frantically emailing Sophia to get any advice I could. Her response was a big "hahahaha". Not a good sign. Apparently this guy, who is handsome, successful, interesting, and although he is not tall, has nice shoes.... Went out with my friend. In fact, they spent a lot if time together. Mostly in groups, but also on their own. She also found him dreamy and spent hours planning their future - which never came. Heck, not even a kiss came of all of this time together. If she weren't attractive and fun, maybe I wouldn't be concerned. But she is. And I know lots of guys that think she is. So when she told me that she's pretty sure he's gay, my enthusiasm sunk into the pit of my stomach. Now what? Do I bother trying to flirt with him, possibly making an ass of myself on two fronts?? We are colleagues and he may be gay. Do I blur all lines and throw myself out there? I mean, life is about taking chances, but is this just self esteem mutilation? I want to somehow be sure... Sure that he won't give me a chance. What Ive realize the last few years is that I've got nothing to lose being a bit more forward. However, this is a bit of an exception. Plus, I've gone down the work path of men countless times. I once invented a business need to meet alone with a sales specialist, we briefly dated. Another time, I kissed a guy on a business trip. We ended up going away together for a weekend. The stories go on. All entertaining but none a good idea in hindsight . However, will I ever learn? I'm still Brainstorming a good way to see Joe again!
Cross your fingers that I sleep off some of this crush and don't wake up still high on daydreams about Joe.

Lauren

How does dating work in your country?

3 beautiful, intelligent, successful, single women in 3 different countries USA, Switzerland and Brazil, try to find the answer to this question by sharing their day to day experiences in the pursue of love, fun and something to obsess about on boring days.

We hope you have fun and feel good about your self knowing that “no, you are not the only single girl out there”.

Xx, Bisous, Beijinhos.

Lauren, Anne, Sophia.