So today I met the man of my dreams. Ok, I've said that before, but everytime it happens it renews my hope that I will meet someone great and someday all of the bridal & baby showers, bachelorette parties, dateless weddings, cake tastings, etc that Ive attended with a big smile will be repaid. It will be my turn.
Unfortunately, up until now, I haven't quite figured which guys should not even enter my radar. Case in point:
I'm not desperate to leave my job (yet), but I am looking. I found a great opening in another building with another division and sent my resume. I was informed that I was probably too junior, but that they'd entertain meeting with me. I was afraid that the interviewer would be tall, successful, and cute based on his voice. I was right.
Before I knocked on the office door, I took a quick glimpse through the glass and knew I was developing a major crush. Not ideal pre interview... But cest la vie. We spoke for twenty minutes and then had lunch together. Just sandwiches, but I was already contemplating how to bridge work to social conversation... Success. He KNOWS
Sophia!! How is the world possibly this small? I couldn't even
think about conversation, my head was racing back to how this was the perfect way for me to get some background info on him and move forward to project Make Out With Joe. It was already obvious that I was grossly underqualified for the job.
On my way back to my office, I was already frantically emailing Sophia to get any advice I could. Her response was a big "hahahaha". Not a good sign. Apparently this guy, who is handsome, successful, interesting, and although he is not tall, has nice shoes.... Went out with my friend. In fact, they spent a lot if time together. Mostly in groups, but also on their own. She also found him dreamy and spent hours planning their future - which never came. Heck, not even a kiss came of all of this time together. If she weren't attractive and fun, maybe I wouldn't be concerned. But she is. And I know lots of guys that think she is. So when she told me that she's pretty sure he's gay, my enthusiasm sunk into the pit of my stomach. Now what? Do I bother trying to flirt with him, possibly making an ass of myself on two fronts?? We are colleagues and he may be gay. Do I blur all lines and throw myself out there? I mean, life is about taking chances, but is this just self esteem mutilation? I want to somehow be sure... Sure that he won't give me a chance. What Ive realize the last few years is that I've got nothing to lose being a bit more forward. However, this is a bit of an exception. Plus, I've gone down the work path of men countless times. I once invented a business need to meet alone with a sales specialist, we briefly dated. Another time, I kissed a guy on a business trip. We ended up going away together for a weekend. The stories go on. All entertaining but none a good idea in hindsight . However, will I ever learn? I'm still Brainstorming a good way to see Joe again!
Cross your fingers that I sleep off some of this crush and don't wake up still high on daydreams about Joe.
Lauren
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